For A...What?! Pretty For A Big Girl and Other Phrases That Are Insulting

Hallo Divas, 

ich schreibe heute, weil ich so oft Dinge wie "...trotz deiner Figur" oder "...trotz deiner/deinem [Adjektiv und das entsprechende Nomen hier einfügen]", usw. anhören muss. 



 Trotz deiner Figur…
Trotz deiner Hautfarbe…

Trotz deinem Gewicht…
Trotz deiner Nationalität…


Lass mich bitte klären. Ich höre Sachen immer an wie "trotz deiner Figur, bist du so gut gekleidet" oder "trotz deiner Figur, bist du sehr hübsch". Es wurde mir gesagt, dass eine meiner Freundinnen "trotz ihrer dunklen Hautfarbe" sehr hübsch ist. Was zum Teufel?! Warte mal schnell....Was soll's denn? Willst du mich verarschen oder was?!


Bin ich im falschen Film oder was???? Es gibt so viel mit den Kommentaren falsch aber ich rede momentan nur von den wichtigen: 

- Wenn du sowas sagst, dass ich z.B. "trotz meiner Figur gut gekleidet bin", 
   A. Das bedeutet, dass dicke Frauen sind nicht gut gekleidet
   B. Das bedeutet, dass ich nur gut gekleidet bin weil ich dick bin, ansonsten waere ich nicht gut gekleidet!

Im Ernst jetzt?

Das gilt auch bei dem Satz "trotz deiner Hautfarbe", "...trotz deiner/deinem [Adjektiv und das entsprechende Nomen hier einfügen]", usw. 

Bin ich die einzige die die Nase voll von solchen Kommentaren hat? Bin ich die einzige die sich beleidigt fühlt, wenn sie sowas anhört? 

Bin ich wirklich die einzige die meint, dass das Stirnhirn solcher Leute fehlt? 

Bitte mit solchen Kommentaren aufhören. "Du bist gut gekleidet" oder "Du bist hübsch" reicht. PunktBASTAWenn man "trotz deiner Figur" sagt, ist es eigentlich frech und unhöflich. Noch dazu, sieht man genau wie unentwickelt die Einstellung ist. 

Was meint ihr davon? Wenn ihr sowas anhören müsst? Egal ob es um Große, Kultur, Hautfarbe, usw geht..?

Bitte mitteilen. 


Gruß und Kuss,


La Deutsche Diva


Hey ladies,



I am writing because I've been hearing this limiters lately like "...for a big girl", or "...for a [insert adjective and corresponding noun here]", etc.

You’re pretty for a big girl. 

You dress nicely for a big girl. 
You’re pretty for a black girl. 
You’re smart for an American

Let me elaborate. I hear things like "You dress nicely, for a big girl" or "You're pretty, for a big girl". A friend of mine, said she was told that she's "pretty, for a black girl." I've even gotten the "You're smart, for an American." Hold up, stop the presses. I'm sorry, WHETTTTTTTT?

Did I miss something? There are a plethora of things wrong with these sentences but for now I'm just going to get to the most important: 

- For example, if you say "You dress nice, for a big girl", it implies 
    A. "big girls" don't dress nicely usually  
    B. solely based on my "big girl" status, I am considered to be dressing nicely, otherwise it wouldn't be considered dressing nicely.

Like, what is really being said here?

The same goes for other limiters such as "for a dark skinned girl", "...for a [insert adjective and corresponding noun here]", etc.

Am I the only one that gets tired of people giving me backhanded compliments that limit my talents, my beauty, my intelligence, just my ability to do anything right in life, with comments such as the above?

Am I the only one who feels that people who say such things lack their frontal lobe? 

Can people just stop using limiters? Just say "You dress nicely." or "You're pretty." PeriodEND OF SENTENCE! Don't make it a backhanded compliment by adding limiters like "for a big girl", or "for a [insert adjective and corresponding noun here]. It's very rude and just displays how close-minded and underdeveloped your views on beauty, intelligence, etc are.  

How do you feel about being described with such limiters? Whether it be about your size, your ethnicity, your culture, etc?  

Let me know below.

xoxo, 


La Deutsche Diva

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4 comments :

  1. Or "For a Woman/Girl/Female" I get that all that time, even in the professional environment. When people put limits on their compliments its because they have some sort of insecurity with themselves.

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    Replies
    1. Yes, that too. Don't down play what I'm doing as a woman, black person, fat person, etc. I just don't get how people say ish like that and truly think they are giving you a compliment. I guess that makes sense that it exposes their insecurity. Never thought of it like that. Thanks Tenchy!

      Xoxo,

      La Deutsche Diva

      Delete
  2. I want to comment auf deutsch but this particular keypad isn't set to language change (long story ) and going back to edit is soooo annoying! Aaaaaaaannywsys, imagine how often we will be skipping to the bank! It's quite sad that something as positive as a compliment can be used so negatively but hey who says the world is perfect right

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    Replies
    1. J,

      Keypad? I take it you aren't home? Or are you on your phone?

      I just hate when people say stuff like that. To me, that's not a compliment and if so, it's a backhanded one. People have gotten so rude to the point they actually think they are being nice, when they are being rude!

      xoxo,

      La Deutsche Diva

      Delete

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